Pepper & Jarvis Takeover: The Interview
Today’s blog is a little different, friends — because I am NOT the one running the show. Nope. My two pit mix babies, Jarvis (11) and Pepper (7), have agreed to sit down with me for a very exclusive interview. Buckle up, because when you hand the mic to dogs, chaos follows.
Me: Welcome, Jarvis and Pepper! Thanks for joining me. As if you had a choice.
Jarvis: [yawns] Yeah, yeah. Can we make this quick? It’s nap time.
Pepper: Excuse me, I was outside soaking up the vibes. Wait. Is Dad here? It is possible Dad will sit down and I need to claim cuddle rights before Jarvis does.
Me: Nope. Just me. Sorry to disappoint. Okay, Jarvis, you’re 11 now. What’s life like as a senior pup?
Jarvis: First of all, I’m not old. I can still jump, like, six feet in the air, thank you very much.
Me: Yes, I know about the jumping. So does just about everybody that comes into the house. Every guy that comes in wishes they didn’t know about the jumping. We would probably have more visitors if you didn’t jump so much.
Jarvis: They are here to see me! I need to show my appreciation. Anyway, naps are now my new religion. Honestly, I’d manage to sleep more at night, if Pepper’s snoring didn’t sound like a freight train barreling through the room.
Pepper: [side-eyes Jarvis] Excuse you. It’s called rhythmic breathing, and some people find it soothing.
Me: Don’t worry, Jarvis. Your Dad’s snoring is bad, too. You can even hear it through the wall. So, Pepper, what’s your favorite thing to do?
Pepper: Being outside. For hours. I could run, sniff, and patrol the yard forever. I mean, until it gets too hot. Then I gotta cool down, ya know? Also… cuddles. With Dad. Always Dad. Sorry, Mom.
Jarvis: snorts She acts all tough until you mention water. One drop of rain and suddenly she’s “fearless but fragile.”
Pepper: SHUT. UP. As if you don’t run inside too. Please. You love to play in it when someone has a hose, but, the moment it rains… RUN!
Me: Okay, okay. Put the chompers away. Jarvis, people say you bark at everything. Care to explain?
Jarvis: It’s called security. You’re welcome. Sure, I may bark at the wind, I may bark at cars, it’s anything I sense with “bad vibes” really. Everyone is my friend, sure, but you never know when a suspicious squirrel is plotting world domination.
Pepper: Don’t let him fool you. He just likes the sound of his own voice.
Me: Pepper, I’ve heard you have a little… attitude sometimes?
Pepper: Sometimes? Lady, I am the attitude. If you don’t give me what I want, when I want it, you’ll know it. A little side-eye here, a little pawing there. I have to make sure I get what I want.
Me: A little… a little pawing? Girl. I have scars!
Pepper: Don’t worry! I make up for it with some snuggles and kisses! It’s fine!
Jarvis: More like drowning people in slobber.
Me: Any special skills you’d like to share?
Jarvis: I know so many tricks. Sit, shake, spin, stay — I’m basically a genius. But really, my most important job is being a Mama’s boy. Wherever she goes, I go. End of story.
Pepper: Tricks are overrated. I prefer vibes. My special skill is snuggling into Dad’s lap and refusing to move until my demands are met. Which is scratches and snuggles. I get them every time.
Me: Yes, I know. Little princess that you are. Last question — if you could sum up your life in one sentence, what would it be?
Jarvis: Eat. Nap. Bark. Repeat.
Pepper: Love hard, play harder… but don’t you dare get me wet.
So there you have it — straight from the pups themselves. Stay tuned for Part 2, where Pepper and Jarvis will take over the blog completely. I can’t promise what they’ll write (probably complaints about my snack distribution), but I can promise it’ll be entertaining.
What are some weird/quirky things your pets do? Do they snore like a freight train? Bark at a leaf dancing in the wind? I would love to hear all about it! Be sure to share them down below!!!
🐾💜 – I hope your life be full of snuggles and treats!
Kimmie + The Chaos Pups
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